


Winter Nights

by oddash



Series: Reconstruction [2]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-14
Updated: 2020-05-18
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:40:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 16,996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23655493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oddash/pseuds/oddash
Summary: “Hey has anyone else ever notice that there’s something odd about our birthdays?”Winter holds a special place in her heart and Byleth reflects on her life as an Archbishop, mother, and wife.
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/My Unit | Byleth
Series: Reconstruction [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1760074
Comments: 20
Kudos: 153





	1. Chapter 1

**4 Guardian Moon, 1206**

“Hey has anyone else ever notice that there’s something odd about our birthdays?” Shiida, tired of her board game with Avel, asked the others.

Rodrigue looks up from his book. “What do you mean?”

Shiida sits up from the floor, stretching her arms.

“Well think about it. They’re all really close together. Rody, Edel, and mother all have birthdays in the Horsebow Moon. The twins’ birthday is in the Wyvern Moon. Gery and I have birthdays during the Red Wolf Moon. And father’s closes the year out in the winter.”

“Yeah, now that you mention it, almost all of us were born in the autumn months,” mused Avel, absorbed with planning his strategy, “But so what, what’s so weird about that?”

“Well come on. Isn’t that very unlikely?” she asked, vexed. “Six siblings and not one of us was born in the spring or the summer?”

“Well..” Rodrigue scratched his head. Annoyed at her brother’s response, Shiida redirected her attention.

“What do you think mother?”

Sitting near the fire place, rocking her youngest child in her arms, their mother gave a peculiar smile. “Hmm… I’ve never noticed.”

Unsatisfied, Shiida rolls her eyes and returns to her game. A few weeks had passed since the Anniversary of Garreg Mach’s completion and as per tradition, the royal family had traveled to Fhirdiad to oversee their duties to north. With the heavy storms fast approaching, Kain and Geralt took the opportunity to go out training with their father. The others, meanwhile, chose to rest inside to avoid the rising snow. With Edel gently sleeping on her chest, Byleth looked out at the snow and smiled, reminiscing on pleasant memories.

**Guardian Moon, 1188**

After much fierce debating, the Royal Committee agreed to move the new capital of Fódlan to the center of the continent near Garreg Mach. The wide continent and treacherous paths made it difficult to travel in the north, particularly during the winter seasons, and it also allowed for the former Empire and Alliance territories to hold more political footing in the new government.

However, many in the Kingdom longed to see their monarch return to the north. His new duties forced the King to travel all over the continent while his busy wife attended church affairs. From the Blue Sea Moon to the end of the Ethereal Moon, the Archbishop lived in the Central Church and oversaw the two largest holidays: the Goddess Rite of Rebirth and the Anniversary of the Founding of Garreg Mach. There wasn’t much time for the royal couple to spend together.

As a means of respite and to pacify Kingdom traditionalists, the King and Archbishop decided after the celebration of the Founding of Garreg Mach to travel north to Fhirdiad for the winter.

As a mercenary, she and her father traveled to the Kingdom many times and during the war, she spent a brief period of time in the capital of Fhirdiad. For Byleth, this was her first extended stay.

After the war, she and Dimitri proposed to each other immediately yet the political climate forced them to put their wedding off. There were still so many duties they had to attend to- laws to rewrite, treaties to fill. Both of them had separate coronations and their work forced them to different parts of the continent. If they were lucky, they managed to sneak in a week, maybe two, where they could have some quiet time to themselves. Unfortunately, those moments disappeared far too quickly.

It was a trying period. Byleth, especially, had to rework many of the old Church doctrines to create the peace she envisioned. Changing the hearts and minds of the Central Church was relatively easy- many of them had witnessed her resolve during the Five Year War. The Western Church and Eastern Church, on the other hand, were slower to change. Still reliant on the nobles in the former Alliance territory, the Eastern Church struggled to provide support to the Central Church and lacked a strong presence. The Western Church, frustrated from years of purging and mistreatment under Rhea’s rule, were especially resistant to her new reforms.

Finally, after a lengthy engagement, the King of Faerghus and the new Archbishop were wed during the Garland Moon at Garreg Mach. A grand occasion, the townsfolk celebrated for days with noble and commoner alike given equal footing. Many of her former students attended, including the new King of Almyra and the new Queen of Brigid. Though, with a heavy heart, she remembered the students who couldn’t make it. The ones who had long past this mortal world.

The political structures within Fódlan were still a new tribulation for her- she envied how Dimitri naturally responded to his duties. Then again, he did spend much of his life training to become a monarch. Even five years isolated and fighting couldn’t remove those skills from him.

Five years…

When they took back Fhridad, Dimitri had many fears about his people accepting him as king. Those fears quickly dissipated when he saw his people cheer for him. The people revered him as a Savior- a lone knight who selflessly fought against the Empire and corrupt Kingdom forces until he reunited with his army and the Church. He hated those stories about himself, felt they ignored his monstrosity and the period where he was ‘more beast than man’.

For Byleth, it filled her heart with gratitude. Dimitri managed to stay alive during that dark time. Alone and hunted- his own kingdom betrayed him yet he survived all that. Even when he was trapped in his own darkness, almost insane, there were signs that the old Dimitri still existed.

For all of his threats, he never attacked his friends. He still showed affection, however slight, to the orphans at the monastery. When they found Dedue, Dimitri looked more at peace than he had for months. It took the aftermath of the Battle at Gondor and Rodrigue’s passing, for Dimitri to finally return to his old self.

No, perhaps that’s not correct. The old Dimitri always had an underlying darkness. She saw it in him from the first moment they met. Unchecked, it almost destroyed him. Now, his sincerity shined. Noble and just, despite his moments of vulnerability and his devotion for others was palpable. Naturally, his people felt it.

Faerghus adored their King. Perhaps a bit too much.

“Have you heard rumors of the new Archbishop?”

“How she never smiles? I know, it’s so creepy.”

“Where did she even come from anyways? Wasn’t she born a commoner?”

“Archbishop and the Queen? No one person should have that much power. What was his Majesty thinking?”

”I heard that Lady Rhea heavily favored her back when she just a professor.”

“Say, she kind of looks like Lady Rhea, doesn’t she? You don’t think-?”

“Nonsense, Lady Rhea would never involve herself in something so crass. The new Archbishop on the other hand-“

“They say she used to kill people for money.”

“Some say she has the face of a demon.”

These rumors appeared everywhere in Castle Fhirdiad. From the nobility to the castle maids, the residents didn’t hold the new Archbishop in high regard. During her mercenary days, she had heard those types of comments from people outside of her father’s company.

On some level, she couldn’t blame them. To an outsider, the Archbishop marrying the King seemed like a political ploy for the Church to gain more power. A former mercenary with odd origins and no formal training in the teachings of Seiros suddenly taking over the Church put many of the faithful at ill-ease. And most days, she still struggled with expression. She supposed it made her appear very cold.

None of those comments bothered her. The comments regarding Dimitri and Rhea, however, caused her insides to twist with disgust.

Making her way down the reception hall, the laughter of children filled the air. Kingdom youths playfully flocked towards the entrance, determined to outshine each other. At the center sat her husband. Popular with both the monastery and Kingdom youths, King Dimitri advocated for improving the lives of children in Fódlan, especially orphans from the war.

Recently, he had taken to the habit of pulling his hair back, leaving a few locks forward to distract from his eyepatch. Somehow, Byleth found that it made him more dashing.

While he patted the head of a young girl with scabby knees, Byleth approached. “Do you have a spare moment?”

“What do you need, love?”

“I was wondering if you would be available for a quick spar.” The day’s duties had ended and she felt lethargic.

He smiled. “Of course.”

“Can we watch, your Majesty?” Interjected a small Duscar boy.

“Please, please?” Begged the young girl.

“Alright, alright little ones.”

As they made their way to the training grounds, Byleth spied several maids whispering amongst themselves. She resisted the urge to wince. The sight of the King and Archbishop sparring in front of babes was sure to start tongues wagging.

“It’ll be a light match,” beamed Dimitri, tossing a training sword to her. “No need for armor or the like.” She nodded.

Eyeing him carefully, she waited for the first move. Suddenly he lunged. She dodged as the lance struck the ground. Dimitri’s technique gave him an advantage with his overpowered blows but Byleth was quick and flexible. Her small stature made it easy to avoid his attacks and smuggle in some quick hits but his defense was impeccable and no blow she landed connected. Undistracted with the cheers in the background, Dimitri and Byleth fiercely continued their duel.

After several minutes, Byleth realized that stamina, not skill, would determine the outcome of this fight. She needed to gamble if she was to get the upper hand. With a quick thrust, she pushed towards his right side to hit him in his blind spot. He quickly raised up his lance to defend but it was too late. She hit him with her sword and he cried out.

She turned to him. From the angle she approached and the way he blocked, the sword veered off its intended path and managed to slice through cloth and cut the skin on his arm.

“Are you alright?”

“Yeah I’m fine. It’s just a scratch,” she nodded and unleashed a healing spell on his open wound. As the warmth enveloped him, he chuckled. “I guess that round goes to you, my beloved.”

The cut closed, leaving an irritated red mark in its place. The prominent tear on his shirt caught her eye.

“This shirt will need to be repaired,” she said simply. “Let me fix it.”

“One of the maids can tend to it. You don’t have to,” uttered Dimitri, his cheeks flushed at the offer.

“I want to. Can you change?” Understanding that he couldn’t change his wife’s mind, he nodded and complied. Bidding farewell to the youths, Dimitri left the training grounds. The children talked excitedly amongst themselves about the thrilling duel that they had witnessed. The adults, on the other hand, saw the duel as something else entirely.

“Did you see that? What a brute.”

“She had no reaction to injuring his Majesty."

“What was she called again when she was a mercenary? The Ashen Demon? It certainly fits.”

She ignored them as she placed the training weapons away. She didn’t want them to sour her good mood. Suddenly she felt a small tug on her cape.

“Um, Archbishop?” One of the Kingdom youths spoke to her, nervously he twisting his hands. “Can you, um, teach me to use a sword like that?”

“Yeah! Yeah! That was great!”

“The way you fought was so fierce! You and His Majesty were like legendary knights!”

_Legendary knights?_ Well given they were both crest-bearers and her fusion with Sothis, perhaps the comparison was apt.

She looked at their beaming faces. During the war, Dimitri had described a situation where some monastery orphans tried to attack him. The very same children they had tried to train for self-defense quickly turned on him for revenge. Time misconstrued good intentions. Edelgard’s good intentions caused a massive war. Rhea’s good intentions created a system of inequality and half truths. And no matter how hard she tried, she knew people could misuse or misunderstand hers and Dimitri’s actions.

Still, if Fódlan was to have a future, she needed to try. If she couldn’t change the hearts of adults, she might have a chance changing the hearts of the next generation. She agreed and the youths cheered.

Over the next week, Fhirdiad experienced its worst blizzard in over half a century. A thick, white blanket covered the Kingdom capital. With travel severely limited, the castle residents were stuck inside its sturdy walls, though some areas of the castle adapted better to the cold than others.

When Byleth awoke, she experienced a terrible chill. The fire she created reduced to embers and it needed a restart. She turned over to find her husband missing.

Many nights, Dimitri still struggled sleeping. The nightmares were so powerful, so vivid, he would jolt from bed shaken and upset. Some nights, she could soothe him and persuade him back to sleep. The worst nights, he was inconsolable and would use the occasion to train or focus on work. Most nights, Dedue accompanied him but some evenings he'd wander on his own. He claimed that he didn’t want to disturb anyone but it never gave her peace of mind.

Since coming to Fhirdiad, his nightmares had only gotten worse. Perhaps this castle brought back too many memories. After much persuasion, he agree on returning before daybreak but Byleth found that he struggled to keep his promise.

She frowned as she tried to kindle the fire. The embers kept dying out. Not even her fire spells could light the coals. She searched, looking for more fuel to add. Then she felt a sharp wind.

She found a hole imbedded in the wall behind the fire place. The high winds prevented the fires from growing as well as suck away any heat. She groaned. It was too late in the evening to fix. With no other options, Byleth grabbed her blankets and sat on the sofa.

Her hands shook at the involuntary shivers as she gazed at the embers, watching them die out. Even with the blankets and proximity to the fire, her shivering only increased. Heavy footsteps echoed down the hall. Gingerly, her door opened and a hulking, cloaked figure walked inside.

“Dimitri,” she whispered. He turned, surprised to see her out bed.

“Byleth? What you doing?” Reaching down to grab her hands, he felt their icy chill.

“Love, you’re freezing!” He rapidly rubbed her hands. “Come closer to the fire, you need to warm up.”

She shook her head.

“No point. The heat keeps escaping.”

“It does?” She pointed to the hole and he went to inspect it. “Blast!” He walked away, searching for extra blankets but after decades of disuse, the staff left the master bedroom woefully understocked. Dimitri unstrapped his cloak.

“Here, use this,” he said, offering her his old war cloak. Thick, heavy furs rub against her skin as its warmth enveloped her body. Dimitri’s soothing scent permeating the old cloak and she found herself more at ease.

“Dear, come join me,” she asked. She couldn’t read his expression in dark but his stiff posture and uneven breathing made her suspect that tonight’s nightmares were especially vivid. Slowly, he wrapped his arms around her and his natural heat slowed her shivering.

“I’m sorry, love,” he murmured. “I wanted your first winter here in Faerghus to be a peaceful experience. Not have you freeze.”

“It’s not your fault,” she said, nuzzling against his chest. His steady heart beat rapidly underneath. “You’re so warm. Are all the people like Faerghus like this?”

“Well I can’t say for certain but I think many of us develop better tolerance for this type of weather.” She chuckled. Rubbing her fingers over his strong pectorals, she felt the outline of his body beneath his shirt.

“Dimitri…” she breathed, “Since we’ve come to Fhirdiad, we haven’t really-” Her fingers rubbed a bit harder against his chest and Dimitri blushed violently.

“I-Is now really the best time for that, love?” His heartbeat spiked but he didn’t pull away. “You might catch cold.”

“It would warm me,” she purred. “Please.”

With that, his heartbeat slowed. He leaned in and carried her to their bed.

As she unbuttoned her loungewear, she saw Dimitri hesitate. Some nights, he was ill at ease with his appearance. The ravages of war betrayed his youth, leaving him with the scars of an aged warrior.

Gingerly, he removes his eye patch. Though the eye was still intact, he struggled to see through it and the jagged scar unnerved people. To him, it was a mark of shame- a reminder of his recklessness and bloodlust. For her, it was something else entirely.

He winced as she rubbed her fingers over the sensitive skin.

“You are so handsome, Dimitri,” she said sincerely. He hesitated, his jaw tightening as if scared to speak. He leaned in to kiss her, removing all reservations.

The fire died out but Byleth was too warm to care. Wrapped in his arms, the gentle pulse of Dimitri’s heart made her drowsy. She didn’t want this moment to end.

“Ah,” he breathed as he took her hands within his own. “Your hands are warm again, beloved.” She smiled and planted a kiss on his brow.

“It’s because of you,” she smiled. He blushed and pulled her for a tighter embrace.

“Whenever you’re cold, tell me. I’ll always be here to keep you warm.”

“Is that a promise?”

“For the rest of my life.” Caressing her wedding ring, he smiled.

The next day, the two slept well into the afternoon. It was a rest well earned.


	2. Chapter 2

**Pegasus Moon, 1189**

For the first time in months, Byleth traveled around the castle without an escort. Dimitri almost forced her to stay behind at Garreg Mach, but she adamantly refused. If he traveled to Fhirdiad, they would both travel together. And after the past several grueling months, Byleth needed a break from her routine.

Once she retrieved a book from the castle library, she returned to their private study and sat down. She grimaced as her dress tightly squeezed her figure. A year ago, she comfortably fit into all her formal clothing and now, she felt lucky if she could breathe properly in her tighter clothes. She brushed the thought aside.

In their study, Byleth watched as the two most important people in her life played on the floor. One was a hulking, powerful king. The other- a small, but resilient infant. The loves of her life.

Last year, shortly after their first month in Fhirdiad, she learned of her pregnancy.

As a mercenary, Byleth never pictured herself becoming a mother. They moved around a lot and her father had cautioned her about getting too attached. She never had a lover- she was too cold, too disconnected from others to form friends, much less a lover. Then, as a professor, she discovered that her heart couldn’t beat. What did it mean? Did that make her human? Was she even alive? Or was she simply going through a series of motions and calling it life?

She couldn’t describe her feelings at the news. So many thoughts raced through her mind, all she could do was cry. Another breathing creature grew inside her. One with a heartbeat.

Dimitri was besides himself with joy. Within the first few months of their announcement, well-wishers showered them with gifts and praises. Her former students and allies had all traveled to Garreg Mach to congratulate her in person.

Yet despite the celebrations, Byleth struggled to shake away her fear. Death didn’t frighted her- she faced death hundreds of times on the battlefield- but leaving her husband and child behind, that chilled her to the core. Her mother died shortly after childbirth and Dimitri’s mother died from a plague; neither of them ever had a chance to know their mothers. Though slight, she didn’t want to die without getting a chance to meet her child.

Then she felt her body change.

She would never describe herself as a vain woman, but in the early months, she felt more beautiful than she ever had in her life. And Dimitri, bless him, adored her. His love and affinity increased from affectionate to sickeningly doting. She couldn’t walk into a room without a compliment or kiss from her husband.

As for her, she developed an insatiable appetite for her husband. Manuela said that was perfectly normal for pregnant women, _“Almost like the body wants to take advantage at not getting pregnant again”_. Embarrassingly, it had gotten to the point where Dimitri started drowsing off during his meetings from lack of sleep.

Over time her body started to betray her. As she grew, her back ached frequently. She obtained a healing staff to soothe her aches only to feel them return hours later. She outgrew most of her clothes and suffered from terrible fatigue. Even basic tasks, such as delivering paperwork or putting on her boots, required assistance. Towards the end of her pregnancy, Manuela advised against ‘sensual’ displays of affection from Dimitri and at eight months, Byleth’s body had become so large and heavy that she lost her drive for any activity outside of resting.

As she suffered from aches and her struggles with sleep, Dimitri stayed at her side against his advisors suggestions to move the Queen to a separate bedchamber for the birth. He simply refused to separate from her.

Then she went into labor. It took several hours, but she surprisingly felt little pain. She started losing more blood than normal and the midwives said something about complications yet Byleth didn’t feel fatigue. The baby’s safety took hold of her focus. More than anything, she wanted to look upon the baby she created with Dimitri. To hold it, to hear it cry, and hear its beating heart.

At last, she heard crying. The midwives quickly grabbed the infant and rushed him for cleaning. She heard Manuela say something about bleeding but she couldn’t comprehend the diagnosis. Her eye lids felt heavy and exhaustion took control.

As she faded consciousness, she fell into a deep sleep. A familiar dream played in front of her. She stood before an empty, ancient throne. Was it-?

_Ah? Are you awake? You must be very proud of the work you’ve done. He’s a very healthy boy._

That familiar voice. Who did it belong to-?

_Have you forgotten who I am?! All this time and you still have the attention of a child. The nerve!Phooey!_

_But worry not. As long as I am here, no harm will ever befall you. I am a life-giver. A Progenitor God. I had many children in the Nabateans. If you so wish it, I can bless you with great fertility. Safe labor and dozens of offspring._

Startled, Byleth shook her head. One child was overwhelming enough, she couldn’t begin to imagine a dozen children.

_Ha, I only jest. You will make a fine mother._

When she awoke, Dimitri was at her side, his face stained as if he had been crying. He embraced her, claiming she had slept for days. Manuela’s diagnosis found nothing dire but her condition was unusual nonetheless.

Then she saw him. In Mercedes arms, a small creature hid in a bundle of blankets. A small, tiny creature unable to open his eyes and struggling to move. To think he caused so much trouble. Little Rodrigue.

After the birth, Byleth rested in her chambers with Rodrigue. The birth had left her very weak and Manuela recommended bedrest to rebuild her stamina. Dimitri still slept with them but with his duties, he often had limited time and when he did find time, he mainly focused on Rodrigue.

Dimitri took to fatherhood like it was the most natural thing in the world. Every free moment he spent playing with him, helping to feed and clean him, and doting on him excessively. Even on nights when Rodrigue fussed, Dimitri assisted Byleth, never complaining. He was completely devoted to Rodrigue.

Even now in their private study, Dimitri guided Rodrigue’s stubby figures to practice grasping objects. The boy struggled to take hold of a stuffed bear, a gift from Bernadetta, and every time he dropped the toy, his father picked it up for him to try again. Byleth smiled as she watched Rodrigue gently tug on his father’s beard in protest.

During the first few months of Rodrigue’s birth, poor Dimitri grew so distraught regarding the safety of his wife and his son that he started neglecting his grooming. His hair had grown longer and more unkempt and he had developed quite a stubble. The facial hair oddly made him more alluring and Byleth found herself enjoying the rough and yet smooth sensation against her skin. It helped Dimitri look more like a father. Though his appearance mostly returned to normal, it took quite a bit of persuasion to convince him to grow a beard. Although at this point, his dashing appearance felt like a curse.

Perhaps it was from the lack of sleep or maybe it was the massive amount of work that had accumulated, but she didn’t feel as close to Dimitri as she did before. His kisses felt more innocent, his touches chaste and when they did talk, it mostly on legislation and Rodrigue. Almost like things had returned to their engagement period, where the two of them were so busy they couldn’t make time for each other.

But that was preposterous, they saw each other every morning, ate together, slept together-yet somehow, she couldn’t shake the feeling that Dimitri looked at her differently.

With six months of limited intimacy, Byleth felt… a bit neglected.

As twilight turned to dusk, Rodrigue started drowsing off. His nanny took him and the royal couple attended to their duties. Now that Rodrigue slept through the night, it felt appropriate to move him from their bed chambers to a separate nursery. It gave them more time to themselves.

Per habit, Dimitri and Byleth brought their reports over to their bedchambers. They sat, side by side, comparing notes and discussing charters. It was boring work, but having Dimitri at her side made the tasks more pleasurable. Resting her head on his shoulder and listening to his smooth breathing, Byleth felt that earlier crave for intimacy. 

Coyly, she rubbed her fingers over his hands. “Dear?”

“Yes?” His expression neutral.

“We haven’t sparred in a while,” she said affectionately.

“Oh yes,” he blushed, “It has been a while. Um…”

She gave his hand a tight squeeze. “Do you want to join me?”

“Beloved,” his tone disapproving, “Maybe now’s not the best time. It’s late.”

“We’ve trained later than this,” she pointed out. He smiled, affectioning stroking her hair.

“You just had a baby, love. You shouldn’t over exert yourself”

“Dimitri, it’s been 5 months,” she protested. “I’ve been cleared for all regular tasks.”

“Even so, it’s unwise to put unnecessary strain on yourself. Here, let’s enjoy a nice cup of tea.”

He sat up to reach for the teapot but she shook her head. She didn’t want him to see her disappointment.

“In that case, I’d rather go to bed.”

“Very well,” he said, “I’ll join you in a minute.”

As she disrobed, she continued to hear the scratches of Dimitri’s quill. During her pregnancy he chastised her for constantly working. Many nights, after Dimitri fell asleep, she snuck away to focus on rewriting church bylaws. If she felt drowsy the next day, she easily blamed it on her insomnia. She hated feeling useless and with her pregnancy limiting her movements, she overcompensated. At the time she didn’t know but it factored into her difficult labor.

Now, it felt like Dimitri was the one pushing himself too hard. He didn’t have too many new assignments this moon. Was he avoiding her?

Most nobles married out of obligation, as a means to build up their territories or to ensure an heir. That’s why arranged marriages prevailed in the high social circles and it was not uncommon to hear older nobles refer to their marriages as ‘duties’. But that wasn’t Dimitri- his heart couldn’t allow it. She shook the thought away and slipped into bed.

After several minutes, she felt the gentle weight of Dimitri’s body on the bed. As he drew closer to her, she felt his warmth radiate under the sheets, enticing her. Yet he didn’t come all the way. Why was there a distance? She shifted and gingerly moved towards him, wrapping her arms around his broad torso and sneaking a tender kiss to his shoulder.

“Not tonight, love,” he moaned. She nodded but kept her arms around him. If he wasn’t feeling amorous, surely he’d welcome some chaste intimacy. To her surprise, he pulled away from her arms. Frustrated, she sat up.

“Dimitri, what’s wrong?”She fumed.

“Nothing’s wrong, dear,” he said, groggily avoiding her.

“You’ve never been a good liar, love,” she said gently. She brushed the hair from his eye and tucked it behind his ear. “Please tell me. I don’t want things to be different between us.”

He turned over to face her, his eye gazing firmly. “But they are different, beloved. We’re not the same people as before. We have Rodrigue to think about.”

“What does Rodrigue have to do with our intimacy?”

His bashfulness betrayed him. “He well- being a parent it-“ he spluttered. “It changed my view on everything, how I spend my time, my decisions, how I look at you-”

Byleth’s insides squirmed.

“I know my body isn’t fully back to normal,” she confessed, shamefully avoiding his gaze. “I’m not as fit as used to be but I have lost much of the extra weight. I thought-”

His eye widened and he shook his head apologetically. “No, no. It isn’t that. You are as dazzling as ever. No, more so.” He placed his hand softly against her cheek.

“After Rodrigue’s birth, you lost so much blood. You slept for days and no one knew when you’d wake. It terrified me, love. If that happened again- if we had another child I would-“ He trailed off. Byleth understood. Dimitri wasn’t turned away from her appearance or a lack of desire. He was afraid of losing her if they had another child.

Delicately, she placed her hands on his face. He flinched at her touch and as she caressed his cheeks, she pulled him in for a tighter embrace. He resisted, torn between his affection and his desire for distance. Eventually he complied and warmth radiated from his body as he rested his head on her bosom. His face grew hot from all his blushing.

“Dear, why didn’t you tell me you were afraid?” She asked, running her fingers through his hair.

“I didn’t know how to start,” he confessed. “It was such a joyous occasion. The first crown prince of Faerghus in decades.” He buried his face further in her chest. His voice cracked. “I never imagined becoming a father. I was so convinced that I deserved to die- that I had no right to live for myself. Yet seeing you with Rodrigue in your arms, I- It made me so happy. You gave me a family.

“But it could cost your life. In the back of my mind, I couldn’t shake that memory of your body, breathing but unresponsive. During the war, you mentioned sleeping for five years. What would I do if that happened again? To lose you to something that seems so preventable, it frightens me. If there was some way I could control it I-“ She stopped him with a kiss. Her fingers messaged his scalp, soothing him until she felt his rapid breathing slow. Her sweet, wonderful husband. She pulled his chin up, gazing at his crestfallen eye.

“You wanted to live the rest of our lives with no intimacy, love?” she asked incredulously. He chuckled.

“When you put it like that, it doesn’t sound like a very good plan, does it?” He rested his chin on her shoulder and sighed. “I don’t want to lose you.”

“Nor I you,” she affirmed. “I can’t promise that. But no matter what happens, I don’t regret my choices. Whether we have one child or a dozen children, I love you, Dimitri. If I couldn’t express my love to you, I would be very sad.”

He lifted his head up and gazed at her. Cupping her face with his massive hands, he pulled her in for a kiss. His lips vigorously pushed against hers as Byleth experienced the most passionate kiss she had received in months. Her body burned with enthusiastic desire as she passionately ran her fingers through his hair. Her heart sank when he pulled away.

“I have so many regrets, love. I do not wish to add your unhappiness to that list.” He shifted his body, opening his legs and pulled her for a tighter embrace. Gratefully, she nestled on his chest, his arms tightening.

“It really has been a while, hasn’t it? I almost forgot what it felt like having you in my arms.”

“I’m not too heavy?” She asked, still embarrassed from her earlier confession.

“Of course not. I meant what I said earlier. You somehow managed to become more beautiful,” he cooed. Her cheeks flushed as he gently started kissing her neck. She then caught a glance of a rare, mischievous smile.

“I especially enjoy these,” he said, giving her larger breasts a quick squeeze. She squeaked suddenly, frightening him.

“I-I’m sorry,” he apologized. “Should I not touch them. Are they-?”

“They’re just a bit tender. It should be fine. Please be gentle.” He nodded and she snuggled back into his arms. Slowly, he proceeded to kiss her neck. As he worked his way down, she felt the heat rising from her core to her head. Her face flushed. Oh Sothis, how she miss this. With each kiss, he grew bolder and bolder. His fingers trembled, trying restrain himself but in vain. He missed her as much as she missed him.

The hours passed as they leisurely reacquainting themselves with each other’s bodies.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's the 30th anniversary of Fire Emblem! Let's celebrate with a new chapter!


	3. Chapter 3

**Guardian Moon 1192**

The snow fell on the castle grounds but it was so light and ephemeral that it didn’t hinder daily activities. Byleth sat out, enveloped in a thick winter cloak, to bask in the early morning air and wait for the snow to end. Yesterday Dimitri returned from a diplomatic trip to the Charon region. He had some minor business to attend before joining her but she didn’t mind. It gave her an opportunity to watch her children.

Her heart swelled at the sight of Rodrigue and Shiida playing in the snow. Rodrigue tossed snow overhead, making his little sister giggle. At three, soon to be four, Rodrigue was shy little boy but so kind. And Shiida, spoiled sweet, loved attention from her brother and her parents.

Over the past several years, Byleth felt more confident as a mother. Though she still struggled with displaying her own emotions, she learned to better read her children's needs. It helped that the two took after their father with their emotions, so clear and honest.

It was difficult to find time to spend together. Dimitri often traveled away for weeks on diplomatic trips and on his travels, she knew he missed them more than anyone. Her duties as Archbishop pulled her away from the children too. They had a reliable nanny but it saddened her to spend time away from them. She supposed those feelings transferred over because recently, Rodrigue and Shiida started sneaking into her office while she worked. When she last told Dimitri, he laughed and stated that the two started joining him too, hiding under his cloak to avoid getting in trouble with the nanny. 

Poor Dimitri. He was so frantic when she told him of her second pregnancy, especially so quickly after Rodrigue’s sixth month. Yet somehow her second pregnancy transitioned much smoother than her first one and she didn’t lose consciousness the second time around. When Shiida was born, Dimitri ecstatically doted on her as much as he had on Rodrigue, perhaps more so.

The snow stopped, disappointing the children until they heard the ground crackle and snap beneath the footfalls of a familiar figure. Rodrigue enthusiastically waved at his father while Shiida rushed towards him, clinging to his heavy cloak.

“Papa! Papa play with us!” Begged Shiida as she tugged on his cloak. Byleth caught a glimpse of Areadbhar hiding behind his cloak but it served more as a precaution than a true weapon nowadays. He patted his daughter’s head.

“In a minute, love,” he assured her. Byleth rose from her seat to greet him. Though exhausted from his travels, Dimitri asked to spend the day with the children, which Byleth readily agreed. The children miss spending time with him and it gave Byleth time catch up on her work uninterrupted. Though she did want to partake in one activity before working.

As the children happily walked alongside their father, Byleth returned to the castle.

On clear Sundays, Byleth had a routine of going to the lake near Fhirdiad Castle. Years of fishing at Garreg Mach became ingrained in her and it always gave her an opportunity to clear her head. When she found about the lake near the castle walls, she ecstatically found her opportunity. The castle cooks also appreciated an extra supply of fish.

With a proper coat, the Sword of the Creator at her side, and her fishing gear in tack, it would only be a short walk to the lake. Familiar footfalls on the stone ground caught her attention.

“Love? Are you going out?” She nodded at Dimitri, the children hiding in tow. Rodrigue rushed to her and clung to her coat. Lagging behind, Shiida attempted to reach up for her fishing pole.

“Mommy can we join you? Please please please?” Byleth looked up at her husband and he smiled apologetically.

“I know you like your quiet time, but when I told them where you were going, they begged.”

She chuckled. Dimitri’s impeccable authority fell apart when he tried to deny his children anything. “Very well. Do you two want to learn about fishing?” Tugging at her arms, they nodded enthusiastically. Dimitri grabbed her fishing equipment as she led the children towards the front gates.

Many of the castle maids and stablehands greeted them along the way. Byleth had grown quite popular and they all knew her weekly routine. Near the castle gates, stood two familiar knights.

“Professor,” bowed Ingrid, addressing her as she often did in private. Dedue nodded.

“Please allow us to join you.” Resisting the urge to wince, Dimitri placed his hand on her shoulder.

“They insisted,” Dimitri whispered apologetically. “It’s more for the children than anything.”

Eager to reach the lake, the children rush ahead and outpace their mother. Byleth tried to reach them but tripped over the snow. Ingrid swiftly leaped ahead and vanished into the woods. Dimitri chuckled and Dedue shared a rare smile. As Byleth brushes the snow off her cloak, Dimitri offers a sympathetic smile and his arm.

Arm in arm, the two walked down the snowy path. Even with the barren trees and frozen landscape, the scenery was beautiful. Dedue tailed behind them, armor clanking along the way. Though vexed at the intrusion, she appreciated the extra time with her family. Dimitri’s excursions pulled him away from the family far too often and it wasn’t only the children who missed him.

Dimitri turned his head towards a snowy bush, examining it. Plucking a white snowdrop, he brought it her and she felt her cheeks heat up. “Ah there’s that smile.”

_He really is gone far too long,_ she mused. She missed these little moments. As she nuzzled against his thick cloak, she thought of Sothis’ lullaby.

“Are you humming?”

She gazed at him, smiling mischievously “I hum all the time.”

“Yes, when you’re with the children,” he said teasingly, “I can’t remember the last time you started humming with me.”

“Oh? Well I might have to make it a habit.” She joking grabbed his nose, rubbing delicately. He laughed and leaned in closer for a kiss.

Suddenly a vicious roar echoed within the forest.

“Is that a-?” A chill ran down her spine. Dimitri tightly gripped her hand. It couldn’t be-

“The children!”

Crushing the frozen grass beneath, the soldiers rush deeper into the forest. The sound of a falling tree almost deafened the second roar. The children screamed as the demonic beast trampled forward. With the Sword of the Creator Byleth sprang into action.

“Ingrid grab the children!”

Ingrid leaped towards the children and pulled them away from the beast. With the children in tow, she fell back allowing the others to push forward with their attack.

A claw lunged forward, crushing several trees. Byleth dodged multiple attacks, averting the beast’s attention. Dedue, his shield steady, took the brunt of the blows, refusing to yield giving Dimitri an opportunity to smash through the beast’s defenses with Areadbhar. The weakened beast let out a vicious roar. She recognized that pattern.

“Fall back!”

But it was too late. The beast roared and unleashed a wave of projectiles against them. The ground erupted with snow and rock, pushing her back. She heard Dedue’s armor crash against the snow and a second unknown but painful sounding crack rang through the air. To her shock, Dimitri had slammed against a tree. Blood poured down his forehead as he struggled to get his footing and yet he managed to issue a command.

“Go! Finish it!”

Fighting her instincts, she nodded and lunged towards the beast. The beast struggled to avoid her but her blows had become more aggressive. Years of tranquility had not dulled her skills with the blade and the beast pulled back out of desperation. With a final plunge, she stabbed through the beast’s eye, imbedding the sword within its skull.

The beast howled as it fell to the ground. Dark smoke rose from the creature, unraveling its scales and skin. The beast’s outer shell disappeared revealing the corpse of a young man. He looked familiar- but Byleth had no time to think about that. She pulled out her sword and rushed over to her husband.

Dedue was already helping Dimitri get back on his feet. The large gash his side started bleeding onto Dedue’s scarf. Byleth unleashed a recover spell to stop the bleeding and examined his other injuries. He had a gash on the back of his scalp and judging from his breathing, some broken ribs. She continued to heal his visible injuries until he motioned her to stop.

“Are you-?”

“I’ll manage, love. Don’t waste all your magic.” He stood more firmly but Dedue continued to support him.

“Come your Majesty, we must take you to back to castle.” Overhead, Byleth heard the flapping of pegasus wings. Ingrid had returned with a battalion and the knights quickly saddled them back to the castle.

In the infirmary, the nurses and monks rushed to Dimitri’s aid. With his armor and Byleth’s healing magic, he was lucky his injuries were not more severe. As they removed Dimitri’s armor and clothing, Byleth winced. His left side completely discolored with a deep disgusting purple color spread throughout.

The nurses and clerics ushered the Archbishop out of the room to focus on their work. She found her children, both sobbing with their nanny and rushed over to comfort them. Thank Sothis, they were both unharmed. They cried and cried in her arms as she assured them over and over again of their safety. At last a nurse came to update her.

After the nurses healed Dimitri’s more serious injuries, he was finally diagnosed with as a bruised rib and the head nurse ordered that the King be confided to bedrest in the infirmary. For the next few weeks, Dimitri needed to refrain from strenuous activities and travel. Fortunately, the nurses did allow visitation. 

“Papa! Papa!” Screamed Shiida, her tears flowing hysterically as she ran towards her father. Silent and shaken, Rodrigue stood near the door until his mother cajoled him forward. He gingerly walked with her towards his father and sister.

“Oh there, there,” Dimitri consoled, rubbing Shiida’s head. “Don’t fret. Your papa is a strong man.” Fat tears continued to roll down her face and she bawled. He reached down and pulled her into his lap.

“Careful now, your Majesty.”

“It’s fine Dedue.” Gently wiping away her tears, Dimitri managed to calm her down and now less frightened, Rodrigue hugged his father. Byleth sat down next to them and bit her lip, trying to hide her anxiety.

A demonic beast in Fhirdiad? So close to the castle? That was impossible. The hunters would have informed the knights. No, the more likely thing scenario is that the beast would have turned itself on townsfolk near the castle walls. For it to get so close undetected must mean-

The infirmary door flew open and a knight rushed in.

“Archbishop, we have a report!” A frantic nurse lectured the nervous knight about disturbing the patient while Dimitri nodded at Byleth. The children were safe with him while she attended her duties.

Following the knight, she traveled to the dungeon. Echoes reverberated and she saw several of the Knights of Seiros gathered around an injured monk. When Byleth approached, one of the knights pulled the monk up. She recognized him from this morning.

“Alright, worm! State your piece!” 

“In front of the apostate?” The angry knight held a sword closer to the man’s throat.

“You would do well to watch your words!” Enraged, Byleth stopped the knights.

“What is the meaning of this?”

“Your Grace, this is a monk we’ve captured. We spotted him near the gates an hour after the attack. He was carrying this.” In his hand was an oddly shaped, pulsing rock. A Crest Stone.

“Where did you get this?” She asked quietly. A bitter sensation rose in her throat and her breathing increased rapidly.

“Speak!” The knight threw the monk against the ground. He wheezed.

“Gah! It was supposed to be just her!” Byleth’s breath stopped.

“What do you mean?”

“The rest of the Royal family wasn’t supposed to get involved. Just her.” A knight pushed him back up.

“Who are you working for?” The monk scowled.

“As if I’d ever tell.”

“Archbishop, what is your next coarse of action?”

Byleth closed her eyes. This man plotted to kill her but involved her family. Her blood boiled with her overwhelming fury.

She glared at him. This man was a pilgriming monk from the Western Church. Were they behind this? In her heart, she wanted to purge them. All of them. Anyone she could she could get her hands on. They endangered her husband and her children. She wanted to make them pay. She needed to dispatch her knights and punish the whole lot. She needed retribution.

Retribution.

As the Archbishop, Rhea unleashed ruthless retribution on those who opposed her and the Church. A cycle of punishing those who wronged you, causing future generations to hate you.

It gave Edelgard fuel to fire her devastating war. So determined to end the cycle of revenge, she ruined countless lives.

She engaged in retribution as well, when she hunted her father’s murderer and as a result, she permanently lost her connection to Sothis.

Revenge affected Dimitri too. During the war, it trapped him, consumed him, and it nearly destroyed him.

Now what is it that she seeks? Justice or revenge?

“Investigate this matter further. Find the masterminds behind this plot. Just the masterminds.”

“And what of the others? His accomplice was a stablehand.” That explains why the beast’s human corpse was familiar. It’s possible that there were more spies hiding among the staff.

“Spare them. We must show mercy to those who have done us no harm.”

“What are you saying? You’re going to spare their followers? People complacent in their scheme?”

“We will not start a witch hunt,” she said sternly. “We don’t know how many of them there are. If we attack blindly, it will only give our enemies more reason to fight against us. We must look for the cause behind this attack. Until then, keep this man as a prisoner. Ensure that he doesn’t take his own life.”

The knights complied with her commands. She needed to send reports out to her spies- perhaps write a letter to Yuri, see if his Mockingbirds would be interested in gathering information.

Hours passed and when Byleth finished her reports, the sun had set. On high alert, guards stationed all throughout the castle entrances. Dedue stood outside the infirmary when Byleth returned and she pleaded for him guard the children, offering to take his place. He nodded and Byleth entered. Dimitri beamed when he saw her and she sat at his side, gripping his hand.

She had many enemies, both in and out of the church. Many in the church opposed her marriage, stating that the Archbishop traditionally took an oath of celibacy. Luckily, Rhea managed to alleviate the situation with the argument that the sacred doctrine failed to forbid marriage for the clergy. Though her marriage to Dimitri dissuaded many of her detractors, in truth, it may have only forced them into hiding.

Then there was the nobility. Many of the old noble families disagreed with her foreign polices. Fódlan had long held an isolationist position in world and the Church had always promoted that front. Others disagreed with her policies to increase support to those who lived within Abyss.

Perhaps her most controversial decisions involved changes to the Central Church doctrine. It was long decreed acceptable, in the name of the Goddess, to murder and steal from those who opposed the Church. It was a law well used in Fódlan’s history, a law to help the Central Church keep in power. Anyone who disagreed with the Church could be labeled an enemy and it was justice to kill them. Sothis would have called such a decree disgusting.

Then there were those who slithered in the dark- No, they were gone. She was sure of that. Hapi’s intelligence helped wipe them out.

“Beloved,” Dimitri whispered, tightly squeezing her hand. “It’s late. You should return to our quarters for the night. Dedue can keep watch.” She feigned a smile and reached over to brush his hair.

“I know but I’d rather he keep his eye on the children.”

“Then at least allow for one of the other knights to keep guard. It’s not healthy for you stay up all night,” he smiled wearily. “What’s troubling you?” Rubbing her fingers against the bruise on his forehead, her pent up worry poured out out.

“I don’t have all the information yet. I don’t want to make a decision I’ll regret.”

“Is it about the planned attack today?” Taken aback, Byleth stared at him.

“You figured it out.” He nodded. He sat up and brushed his fingers on her neck. The simple motion eased her tension and she felt herself relax at his touch.

“Of course. Whoever planned it is either very clumsy or trying to misdirect us. Are you worried, my beloved?”

“Hmm… more about you and the children than myself.”

“I’ve experienced worse injuries,” he assured her, his hands cupping her face.

“I know you have,” she said gazing at his hands. His big, strong, crooked hands- misshapen from years breaking. He must have broken his hands countless times during the war and without the aid of healers or knights. It wasn’t just his hands, either. His entire body.

Dimitri is a strong man but she’d seen him break before. She’d seen him break many times. Normally she would turn back the hands of time but there was always that fear- that fear that it wasn’t going make a difference. That fate was set and she’d watch him die, like her father, unable to help him.

“Please let me stay. I have my spies investigating the case but right now I-“ she tried to speak but the dryness in her mouth trapped her words. Dimitri suffered so much. Too much. He didn’t deserve to be punished for her mistakes or for her enemies. “I feel so helpless.”

“Beloved,” pulling her for an embrace, Dimitri counseled her. “You did everything you could. Even with your gift, you can’t predict everything. The children are safe and my wounds will heal. So please.“ Buried in his arms she felt his heart beat steadily, soothing her worries. He was alive and with her- that’s what mattered.

Time slowed. Minutes felt like hours, yet she didn’t want to leave. Eventually the silence of the empty infirmary caused Dimitri to shift.

“If you wish to stay perhaps it would be better if you- no never mind.” He kissed her forehead and broke the embrace.

“What?”

“It’s just, well, if you wish to stay, perhaps you would feel more comfortable if you were with me.”

“I am with you, dear,” she giggled.

“No I mean. Here,” he said, patting the mattress. “With me.” Byleth’s face flushed.

“Dimitri, no! No, you’re injured.” His cheeks reddened.

“I wasn’t suggesting-! I meant to sleep, really I did. It’s too late for all that anyways.” Bashfully, he scratched the back of his neck. It reminded her of his school days, back when he was a reserved young prince. Suddenly she caught glimpse of an unfamiliar roguish smile.

“Unless,” he whispered. “You want to. I wouldn’t mind.”

“Darling, you have a bruised rib.”

“I told you before: I’ve experienced far worse injuries than this.” She sighed, her cheeks bright crimson. Sometimes she missed his shy younger days when a simple touch or a kiss overwhelmed him. To request such a thing, after an injury like that; it was absurd. Yet she looked back at him, his gaze focused. If her heart could beat, it would probably be palpitating. To see him here alive, filled her with immeasurable gratitude. And perhaps, some lust.

“Ok,” she said simply. “But don’t push yourself. If you have a hard time breathing we need to stop.”

“Understood,” he nodded, shifting in bed. She unclipped her cloak and placed it over her chair. Her archbishop robes suddenly felt too hot despite its light material and it felt tighter around her chest.

“If you feel discomfort of any kind, we need to stop,” she insisted, carefully climbing onto the infirmary bed.

“Right,” he said, his fingers running down her robes. Swatting his hands away, she motioned for him to move.

“And you need to sit upright, otherwise the bruise will get worse. Limit your movement.” Though slightly vexed, he complied. She leaned and breathed into his ear. “Leave everything to me.” He chuckled.

“Beloved, I am always in good hands with you.”

She smiled and leaned in for a kiss. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Pegasus Moon 1197**

“Mommy! Mommy Look at what I caught!” Avel proudly waved his trout.

“No mommy look at mine! My fish is way bigger!” Kain interjected, determined to show off his prize. Avel pouted.

“It is not!”

“It is too!”

Byleth laughed. Though it wasn’t as plentiful as the fishery at Garreg Mach, the frozen lake near Fhirdiad allowed ample opportunities for ice fishing. Several years ago, angry remnants of the old Empire attempted to attack the Archbishop on her outing and from that point on, it became tradition for her to travel with company. She didn’t mind though, as it provided wonderful opportunities for family outings.

The boys argued all the way back to their picnic site where their father and older siblings were setting up. Byleth placed the equipment away while the boys went to brag about their fish to their siblings. Patiently, Rodrigue nodded along with the twins’ ramblings while Shiida brusquely questioned the species of fish and if they were edible. Dimitri beamed and encouraged the boys to clean up.

“It’s time for lunch everyone,” he motioned, placing the dishes down. “Let’s see, we have cheesy verona stew, sweet buns, vegetable stir-fry and sea bass.” Shiida enthusiastically searched through the dishes.

“Where is it? Where’s the sea bass?”

“It’s right here. See, bass?”

Shiida pouted. “Father those types of jokes aren’t very funny.”

“Spending time with Alois again, dear?” Byleth asked, pretending she didn't already knowing the answer.

“Was it that obvious?”

She snickered. His latest attempts at humor improved. When Dimitri had regained his sense of taste, they engaged in family picnics fairly frequently. Though still busy, things had settled down over the past few years within the Church and in the old Empire territories, allowing both of them to spend more free time with their family. Normally, they spent their time together- training, reading, playing games- stuck within the castle but fortunately, the late snowfall this year allowed them to indulge in special activities like these.

After lunch, Dimitri took the twins horseback riding while Byleth used the opportunity to coach Shiida and Rodrigue on their swordplay. Quick on the uptake and enthusiastic, the two made fine students. It filled her heart with pride to watch them improve their combat arts and to know that her skills as a teacher had not waned with time. Yet a part of her felt conflicted training her children.

In Faerghus, the rough terrain made it necessary to train soldiers and knights. The children learned the art of swordplay before learning to read or write; for some it was the only way of life. However, with new resources coming in from the west and new farming techniques improving the terrain further north, the need for hardened soldiers and mercenaries decreased. Some nobles criticized these reforms as “the death of knighthood” but Byleth disagreed. In her eyes, it created a new type of knight- one that could focus more as a peacekeeper and negotiator. Faerghus, no all of Fódlan, carried a long and bloody history of conflict. It plagued the land for a millennium. Though she trained them, she hoped that there would never come a time where her children needed to use their fighting skills.

The afternoon sun passed and the family packed their bags to return to the castle. As the children ran off, a royal advisor pulled Dimitri aside and he signaled to Byleth that he had matters to attend. She nodded and walked over to the castle library to catch up on some tactical reading.

The Fhirdiad library wasn’t as expansive as the library at Garreg Mach but it did specialized in many history books on the Kingdom and its surrounding territories, tactics, tomes, and illustrated guides on the common folk. When she walked in, she wasn’t surprised to see Flayn flipping through the Kingdom’s copy of _Ribald Tales of the Faith War_.

On their last transition from the monastery to Fhirdiad, Flayn requested to join them. She had gotten into the habit of traveling these past few years- determined to experience the world with fresh eyes. Seteth grew anxious when she traveled alone and beseeched that the Archbishop accompany her to the Kingdom. She understood and agreed. Though Flayn had grown less naive, she was still prone to getting lost and tricksters got into the habit of stealing her money.

As a professor, Byleth always thought Flayn looked too young to be a student. Her small stature rivaled that of Lysithea and her naiveté suggested a sheltered life if she had not displayed maturity betraying her appearance. Now, sixteen years later, she looked exactly the same.

Flayn looked up from her book. “Hello, your Grace. How was the picnic?”

“It was wonderful, Flayn,” beamed Byleth as she grabbed several tomes and maps. Flayn hummed and returned to her book, her cheeks a bright pink. Byleth sat down next to her and engaged in her book.

In the short time since she had arrived, Flayn had made quite a reputation for herself. She had established herself as a traveling bishop and insisted on helping the nurses around the castle. In her free time, she went down to the kitchens to help the cooks and, with Dedue’s help, managed to create some delectable dishes. Byleth mused at the increase in fish dishes over the past week and surmised that Flayn had endeared herself to the kitchen staff.

“Your Grace,” Flayn chirped, interrupting her thoughts. “What are your and his Majesty’s plans for the Garland Moon this year?” Odd question, but Byleth paid it no mind.

“Nothing too special. The weather will be warmer so we’ll have more opportunities to go out and fish with the children.” Puzzled, Flayn tilted her head.

“Oh really? That’s strange. I thought you and his Majesty would want to do something a bit more romantic.” Byleth chuckled.

“His Majesty and I have plenty of romance throughout the year. There’s no need to concern yourself.” With a continent to watch over, a church to run, and four children, she was grateful to just have a quiet evening alone with her husband, let alone something overly saccharine. “Why Garland Moon, anyways?”

“Well, that’s your anniversary, is it not? You and his Majesty have been married for almost a decade. I was reading that most royal couples use it for grand occasions.”

“Flayn it hasn’t been-“ she stopped. Memories of her wedding rushed through her mind- their first dance, their shared kiss- but they blurred under the mantle of an unspecified time. They were wed under the Garland Moon one year after the war. The Garland Moon in 1187. In four months, she’ll have been married for ten years. Her breath stopped as she pondered at the amount of time. How did she forget?

“I guess it really has been ten years,” she said, her voice shaken. Flayn, fortunately, didn’t hear it and jubilantly reminisced.

“My, how time flies! I remember when you first showed us Rodrigue. The whole monastery was thrilled. We celebrated for days and poor brother could barely carry out his duties, he was so emotional.” Struggling to smile, Byleth tried comprehend the staggering realization at her passage of time.

Fortunately, a knock on the door signaling supper interrupted their conversation but Byleth couldn’t escape her thoughts.

Ten wonderful years of marriage. Had it really been that long? The war ended eleven years ago and she had known Dimitri for over sixteen years now. Of course if she had known Flayn for sixteen years, she knew Dimitri for that same amount of time.

Sixteen years ago, she was his professor at Garreg Mach and he was a student, still a boy. They were different people back then; revenge and grief clouded his thoughts and her cold demeanor isolated her. That one year had many trials and tribulations yet for the first time, she truly felt alive. Thinking back on those days, she found that her experiences felt foggier and foggier. Faces of the students and staff began to blur. Most distressing of all, she struggled to remember her father. His voice, his mannerisms, his likes and dislikes- all the things she took for granted- now distant memories.

She had numerous fears since she awaken from her fusion with Sothis. When she spoke to Rhea after the war, she discovered the truth of the Nabateans. How the Nabateans were Sothis’ children, how they could assume dragon forms, and worst of all, their expanded lifespans. Rhea, Seteth, and Flayn had lived for over a thousand years and stayed young while those around them grew old. Was that to be Byleth’s curse as well?

Over the years, she received many compliments on her appearance- how vibrant she seemed, how slender she was despite mothering four children. Even as the others changed around her, Byleth felt trapped in her unchanging body.

Yet something Rhea told her always made her doubt. _“The flow of time is not something one can predict. It brought you back to me and to the monastery but you managed to carve a destiny far beyond what I had ever imagined. I am sure that time will flow in your favor.”_

As Byleth gazed at the cheery faces of her children, she pushed those worries from her mind. Now wasn't the time for such unpleasant thoughts

The hours passed and evening turned into night. Flayn entertained the children while Dimitri and Byleth focused on their individual duties until it was at last time to retreat to their bed chambers. Most nights, Byleth and Dimitri diligently brought their work into their personal chambers and drove each other crazy with their work ethics. Dimitri often chastise her for working without candlelight and she’d scold him for working without sleep.

However, tonight served as a brief respite from such things. Tonight was going to be a quiet evening, enjoying each other’s company. Already in bed, Byleth comfortably rested under several large blankets and a good book in hand. Tending to the fire, Dimitri ensured that the flame would blaze through the night before making his way towards the bed.

Gazing zealously at his wife, Dimitri advanced and hungrily started kissing her. Byleth pulled her book to her face, playfully pretending to ignore him. Unperturbed, he moved on to kissing her hands, whispering about their warm delicate touch. He kissed and kissed until Byleth snickered at the absurdity, giving him a chance to lean in.

His lips pressed heavily against hers. Byleth struggled to breathe but enjoyed this irregular show of passion. She ran her fingers down the rugged, powerful frame hidden underneath his tight turtleneck and he released a gentle moan. Her face flushed as he ran his fingers down her thighs, gripping tightly. Most nights, Dimitri started gently before reaching this level of intensity but Byleth paid it no mind. It gave her an excuse to exert some force back. She tightly grabbed his shoulders and pulled him closer. His breathing increased as her grip tightened. Suddenly to her surprise, he pulled away, groaning in pain.

He frowned and started rotating his bad shoulder. Twinging with guilt, Byleth reached over to help him massage it.

“I’m sorry, beloved. It’s my shoulder. It’s been aching all day with the weather. I might need a-“

“Here. Let me help you dear.”

She reached for her drawer and pulled out a healing salve. During her pregnancies, she had gotten into the habit of applying salves to her aches and expanding belly. Now it served a dual function of relaxing muscles and aches for Dimitri. She helped him pull off his tight turtleneck and began to apply the salve on his shoulder. As she massages his tense muscles, she explores the various scars and injuries on his body. Each one with a story.

As time passed on, Dimitri developed more and more marks on his body. A few new ones from the battle skirmishes maintaining the peace. A scar on his leg from the time Shiida almost fell off her horse and Dimitri leaping in to catch her. A burn mark on his arm from Avel dropping a candle. A bruise on his side from this week’s earlier training session. Reminders of Dimitri’s mortality.

Dimitri was still a healthy man but she began to notice new things about him as he aged. His muscles tensed more often and once in a while he would complain about aches like the one in his shoulder. A few graying hairs started sprouting in his scalp and the other day she noticed one hiding in his beard. When they sparred, his reactions slowed and though he was very fit and muscular, she noticed he was getting a little wider around his midsection.

Dimitri was changing. In time, she was going to watch her strong, handsome husband grow old and weak while she stayed the same. Then she would watch her children grow old and their families grow old and eventually all of them were going to leave her behind. Oh Sothis, did her father experience this? He had ingested Rhea’s blood and inherited her Crest, living long past the lifespan of a normal man. How many friends and loved ones did he witness dying? Did he even remember them? Did he raise her, knowing that he was probably going to outlive her?

“Dimitri, tell me. Do I look different to you?” His brow furrowed as he puzzling stared at her. She gazed at him pleadingly until he answered.

“No I don’t believe so. You’re radiant as always, love.” Dissatisfied, she disrobed.

“That’s not what I mean. Since we’ve been married, have I changed? Physically, I mean.” He stared, unsure of how to respond. She nodded and gave a subtle smile, inviting him. Gently, he lifted his massive hands to explore.

He started with her face. He softly caressed her, circling her cheek with his thumb. She loved the sensation. If her heart could beat, she was certain it would be pounding. Then his warm calloused fingers rubbed down her chest to her sides inspecting old scars and marks. Her skin became hot under his touch as he slowly moved his fingers down her legs. It was too wonderful a feeling. Her breaths became more and more shallow as she desperately waited for his examination to end.

“Well these are bigger,” he said gently squeezing her breasts. She exhaled, trying to suppress a chuckle.

“Yes from mothering four children. Anything else?”

“There’s this scar on your leg.”

“Ah yes, that,” she smiled. A few years ago, she and Rodrigue went out hunting near Garreg Mach. A giant wolf attacked and when she had rushed over to save Rodrigue, the creature had sliced through her leg. It took several divine pulses but Rodrigue came out unscathed. The minimal damage was a new scar on her leg but she always took it in stride.

“I don’t know what else to say. You’ve only gotten more beautiful.” She felt her blood turn cold. Though his compliment was sincere, if her body hadn’t changed in a decade it truly meant that she was like Seteth and Flayn. She would be forced to watch everyone she loved grow old without her.

“Dimitri,” she whispered, her head held down. “I’ll always love you, no matter what happens. Even as you turn into an old man I’ll love you.”

“Hold on what are you-?”

“Please let me say my part. No matter how either of us look on the outside, my feelings will never change. I just want to you to be happy, the way you make me happy.”

She could feel his piercing eye on her but she couldn’t bring herself to look at him. Slowly, he pulled her in for an embrace. His rough fingers ran through her hair, soothing her.

“Love, you already make me happy. You’ve brought me more joy than I could ever imagine, more than I ever deserved. Nothing will ever change that.” She nodded, trying to etch this moment in her memory. Soon, there will be a point where memories will be all she’ll have.

“Beloved,” he mused, combing through her hair. “I think I found one thing that might be different. Look at this.”

“Hmm?” He pulled out a stray hair and showed it to her.

“A gray hair.”

“What?”

“Actually there are several of them. You hide them pretty well, love. Though that’s probably something a lady doesn’t like to hear-“ He mumbled an apology but Byleth couldn’t hear him. The news of her graying hair mesmerized her, overwhelming her with glee.

“Dimitri, I love you.” His eye grew wide at his wife’s sudden change in mood.

“Love-,” he started but before he could finish, Byleth interrupted him with a kiss.

“Love I-“ she kissed him again. She kissed him so fervently that he couldn’t get a word in. She kissed and kissed until his face was bright red. When she paused to catch her breath, he put his hands on her cheeks. “I appreciate the affection but where is this coming from?”

“I’m just- so happy, dear.” She snuggled to him, rubbing her hands against his warm, broad chest. Underneath her fingers, his strong heart beat fiercely. She was going to age alongside the man she loved. She was going to see the years with him, struggle with him, and continue to love him as a mortal woman. Suddenly, her desire flared.

“Dear, is your shoulder still aching?”

“Are you-?” He paused, smiling knowingly. "Not too much, my love.”

Too spirited for sleep, yet too exhausted for any other activity, Byleth and Dimitri laid in each others’ embrace. After much internal debating, Byleth decided to share her anxieties with her husband. He patiently allowed her to speak, nodding along, and occasionally his brows would furrow at the history of Rhea’s experimentation. When she finished, she felt the warm sting of tears roll down her face. Dimitri gently wiped them away.

“Beloved why didn’t you tell me any of this?”

“Because I was scared. I was scared to admit it. To accept it.”

“Did you think it was going to turn me away?” She shook her head.

“I knew you would never leave. And I would never want to leave you. Just the thought of outliving everyone would mean that eventually I would have to live alone.” He smiled sympathetically and began caressing her cheek.

“You will never be alone,” he breathed. “Even if you were immortal, you would never be alone. You’re too good, too kind. Someone will always turn to you, like a flower turns to the sun.”

She smiled, burying herself deeper into his embrace. Dimitri always knew what to say to ease her fears.

“And I want to be clear. I’ll love you too, when you’re old. When you have a full head of white, and when you need thick lenses to see.”

“And what makes you think I’ll need lenses?”

“You read too much in the dark, beloved. That can’t possibly be good for your eyes.” She laughed and experienced the most relief she had felt in a long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In honor of Animal Crossing helping people through this difficult time, I decided to incorporate the terrible Sea Bass joke in this fanfic. 
> 
> Also Ribald Tales of the Faith War is still the most clever joke in a Fire Emblem game and I'm surprised it doesn't show up more often.


	5. Chapter 5

**Guardian Moon 1199**

For the past week, the representatives from the Church and the Kingdom officials had been locked in vicious debate. Twice a year, lords and dignitaries from all over Fódlan came to argue over the Kingdom’s infrastructure, new tax laws, and foreign trade policies. The Church’s role was to mediate these proceedings as well as offer support and funds to promising prospects. Normally the proceedings proved to be dull but quiet affairs.

This year, however, the delegates were especially tedious and quarrelsome. An hour couldn’t pass without a dispute over past slights as these petty nobles greedily argued over funds. Perhaps it was due to the heavy snowstorms this winter, keeping everyone in close quarters with each other. Trapped to stew in their frustrations with each passing day, Byleth felt more and more irritated.

The perilous weather prevented several of the more reasonable nobles- Lorenz, Ferdinand, Ashe, Sylvain, Constance, even Bernadetta from attending this year. With the exception of Felix and Seteth, the others were strangers and the lack of support tore at her nerves.

Meanwhile, Dimitri sat, calm and composed, discussing his plans to provide funding for an orphanage near the former Kleiman region. Of course, her husband was calm and composed. Dimitri’s youth consisted of preparation as a ruler. Despite the church integrating her policies and their respect for her, many in the nobility continued to critique her leadership. Her skills as a tactician and general did not translate well to the position of structural politics and even after a decade, she still struggled with others taking her decisions seriously. Times like these severed as reminders of her inadequacies.

“Now your Grace, about this new legislation-“ interjected the noble from House Rowe.

“You’re asking the Church of Seiros to remove Saint Seiros Day from our calendar?” she asked, indignant. “That’s unacceptable, I can’t approve that.”

For the past month, Kingdom officials in charge of public relations had been badgering her on the removal of Saint Seiros Day as a national holiday. Over the past decade, more and more people uncovered records of Saint Seiros forging holy doctrine based on manipulations and creating the Crest System on misinformation. New information from Abyss surfaced regarding the suppression of medicine and technology, further raising public ire.

Few people could connect Seiros to Rhea yet Byleth couldn’t shake off the feeling that it was an offense to her. Her methods were wrong, but Rhea, in her own way, was trying to protect the continent and maintain peace. She could never villainize her, much like how she could never villainize Edelgard.

“Please your Grace,” the noble begged, “Try to understand. The Four Saints are highly revered for their courage and wisdom. However, there are many within the former Empire territories that view Saint Seiros as a highly controversial figure. Many nobles and common-folk are refusing to donate to the Church if it means supporting a history they believe is corrupt. His Majesty agrees.”

“Oh,” she said, her jaw tightening. He never shared his opinion on the matter with her. Fighting the urge to pull him aside, she chose instead to glare at her husband. “Does he now?”

Ignoring her, Dimitri speaks. “It’s not a change that needs to happen immediately. The Church is a sore topic for many people, even now. Perhaps if the Church was willing to bend more, our citizens in the south would-“

“I feel like we’ve bend quite a bit for the Kingdom,” she interrupted. Dimitri clenched his fist and she sensed he was getting annoyed but she disregarded his feelings. “If we bend further I fear we will lose our power and identity. Speaking of which, I received a report yesterday on our citizens from the south” She nodded at Seteth and he handed her the reports on Hrym.

“The reports from Duke Aegir show that the bandit problem in Hrym has increased significantly since the drought last summer. Villages are being pillaged and we received a request to deploy the Knights of Seiros. However, our investigation shows that the bandits are better equipped than we anticipated. Our number is far too small to handle the crisis. Thus, we request aid from the Kingdom forces.” She passes the report around for the others to read. Numerous delegates nodded along, injecting their opinions until it reached Dimitri. As he read through the report, his brows furrowing. He shook his head.

“The situation in Sreng is still too fragile to move that many soldiers south.”

Of course, Sreng again. It had been the focus of his attention for the past year and it was starting to wear on her nerves.

“The situation in Sreng hasn’t changed over the past three months. Surely they won’t notice if the Kingdom withdraws a few battalions.”

“But we’re still in the middle of peace talks. If we withdraw now, those against it will use the opportunity to attack.”

Rubbing her temples, she proposed an alternative. “Perhaps the Kingdom would be willing to offer supplies? Money and weapons to better defend our knights.”

Raising his hand to his chin and deep in thought, he weighed his options. He shook his head again. “I’m sorry. The war funds are too tight right now. I can’t lend aid to anything outside of our main campaign.”

Her breath stopped. Clenching her fists, she tried to push down the bile in her throat but she found it increasingly difficult. She snapped.

“The people of the Hrym need support now! You’d rather have soldiers risk their lives in an endless struggle in the north than actually help innocent people in your Kingdom. What kind of cold, selfish man are you?!”

The air grew thick with tension. Dimitri stares at her, dumbfounded. Then his gaze sharpened. She realized the gravity of her mistake too late.

“How…” he growled, his fists trembling. “HOW DARE YOU!”

A loud crack and someone screamed. The newer delegates around the table looked on, shocked at the King’s rare outburst.

Dimitri had punched his fist through the table.

Shaken, Dimitri slowly pulled his hand back. Drops of blood trickle from the pieces of splintered wood embedded in his hand. His widened eye looked on at the damage and the silence emphasized the profundity of his actions.

Fortunately, the ever calm Seteth, familiar with Dimitri’s outbursts, managed to regain control of the situation. “It seems we are at an impasse. Let’s regroup tomorrow and see if can reach an agreement.”

Many of the delegates expeditiously agreed, likely out of fear, and Dimitri, unnaturally stiff, nodded. “Very well. Apologies to all of you for my loss of composure.”

With his good hand, he gathered his reports and swiftly left the council room. Several delegates followed suit. As he walked out, he refused to look at Byleth. On the surface, her blank eyes and cool temperament made it appear as if the outburst didn’t affect her. Underneath the table, her clenched hands trembled.

“That boar hasn’t changed,” sighed Felix. Byleth, ignoring his harsh comments, motioned for Felix come closer.

“Felix, can you-?” He rolled his eyes, already knowing her request.

“Yeah, I’ll make sure he gets his hand fixed.” He went to pursue Dimitri giving Seteth an opportunity to check in on her.

“Your Grace, will you be-?”

“I’ll be fine Seteth,” she replied curtly. “Dimitri and I will be fine. Thank you for your concern.” She tried to feign assurance though it was unlikely that Seteth believed her. Still, he gave courteous bow and allowed her space.

After Seteth walked out, Byleth buried her face in her hands.

_What was I thinking? How could I do that here, in front of everyone?_

It had been a long time since the two of them fought like that. During the earlier years of their marriage, she and Dimitri fought like this often. No matter their personal feelings, their roles as Archbishop and King meant they always had to push for the needs of the people first. Thousands of lives counted on them and if they couldn’t agree, they would just create needless suffering. Normally, all they had to do was go out for a horse ride or a picnic and it would clear the air between them but this was different.

No matter how angry she got, she never embarrassed him. She never insulted him. Her anger took hold and she spouted such horrible things towards him. Why was she so angry at him? Because he disagreed with her? No- that couldn’t be it. They’ve had worse arguments.

 _Perhaps it wasn’t him,_ she rationed. Neither of she nor Dimitri slept very well over the past few days, opting to focus on their duties. She hadn’t much opportunity to train or to spend time with the children. The delegations already wore on her nerves but when she received the reports of the Hyrm people, she found herself getting more frustrated. She offered to go herself and lead the fray but Seteth advised against it as the unstable region would leave the archbishop too vulnerable.

Regardless, it didn’t excuse her actions. She needed to apologize. This fight couldn’t put a damper on a marriage that had survived over a decade of disputes, illnesses, and differentiating ideals.

Still, with these heavy storms, it was unlikely that they would have a chance to go outside and mend their feelings.

The sun had set and Byleth went to search for her family. The children, finished with their lessons, gathered in the play room with Geralt’s nanny. At barely over a year old, Geralt received pampering from all his older siblings and it was a common family affair to gather together before dinner. With today’s outburst, she initially believed Dimitri wasn’t going to join them out of shame for his reaction but to her surprise, she found Dimitri there, jovially dismissing Geralt’s nanny for the hour.

As she expected, he was still upset. She saw it in his smile. It looked forced and stiff like it took too much energy. His healed right hand shook slightly as he lifted Geralt but his quick grimace told her that it still ached. He hid it well, all things considered, but ten years of experience gave her insight to his sneakier habits.

Around the children he interacted with his usual doting affection. Kain and Avel enthusiastically tugged at his cape as Shiida and Rodrigue recounted their lessons to him. He cradled Geralt, the little one shoving his tiny fist in his mouth. They didn’t notice the change in his disposition. Then Byleth walked in.

The children eagerly rushed over to their mother yet she saw Dimitri turn away, carrying on as if no one had entered. An uncomfortable tension grew in the air. The children, puzzled, gestured for their father to come join them but he shook his head. Byleth’s blood ran cold.

In all their married years, Dimitri never tried to ignore her in anger. Before she could relieve the tension, a maid interrupted announcing supper.

Dinner was a silent affair. The awkward clinks of dinnerware replaced the common chatter of the table. The older children nervously stared at their parents’ odd behavior but no one had the nerve to speak aloud. Byleth felt her insides squirm as she tried to catch his eye but he never once turned to her.

The more she sat in their silence, the more Byleth thought rationally.

The Sreng territory had led incursions on and off against the Kingdom for over 200 years. It wasn’t until Dimitri’s father, King Lambert, annexed the territory that much of the fighting ceased. However, the new head of the region started showing signs of ambition and sneaking his militia into other territories. The new Margrave of Gautier requested Kingdom aid. Though he could handle the invaders with the Lance of Ruin, Sylvain’s goal of eliminating the nation’s Crest System required a show of power based people’s merits. If his gambit was successful, it could finally end the fighting up north and provide a major boon to the anti-Crest faction. Of course, Dimitri would focus his support there.

That knowledge only proceeded to make Byleth feel worse. He wasn’t trying to be cold or selfish- she was. Too absorbed in her insecurities, she took it out on him and now that affect was spreading to everyone else. As dinner ended, one of the Kingdom advisors walked in requesting to speak to the King. Dimitri nodded and left before Byleth could speak to him.

Evening rolled around and the Archbishop returned to their empty chambers. It wasn’t surprising but it stung none the less. She tried to distract herself with some reports from earlier this afternoon. After her paperwork, she tried reading the new Crest studies report from Lysithea. Hours passed and refusing to sleep, she found a Calvary primer and tried to refresh her studies. Anything to distract from her loneliness.

More hours passed and yet her absent husband still hadn’t returned. At this rate, he wasn’t going to be able to sleep. She needed to find him and she thought of his usual hiding spots. The weather was too frigid for training. The snow was too high for an evening stroll. The only other place she could think of was his study.

Sure enough, she caught a faint light and the heavy scratches of a quill pen. Hunched over his desk, Dimitri was reading over the trade reports from Dagda and Brigid. He roughly flipped through the pages, scowling, and at his feet laid several snapped quill pens. Perhaps it was the poor lighting or his heavy cloak, but in that moment, he looked more like a giant animal than her husband. She chided herself for thinking such a thing; this is Dimitri. He would never hurt her.

Undaunted, Byleth held her head up and entered.

“It’s late, dear,” she said simply. The scratches of the quill answered her. She repeated herself. “It’s late.”

“I’m fine. Go to bed.” He ordered gruffly. Her brows furrowed but she refocused once she realized anger wasn’t going to help her.

“It’s lonely without you.” Refusing to look at her, he grunted. It made her skin crawl but she decided to switch topics.

“It’s cold tonight. Very cold.” Buried in his work, he continued to ignore her but he didn’t deter her. “The last time I felt this cold was- do you remember the first time we came to Fhirdiad after we got married?

“That was over a decade ago. There was a blizzard. A heavy blizzard. Pure white snow as far as the eye could see. Our room had a terrible draft and I was still unused to the freezing winters of Faerghus. I shivered throughout the night. Do you remember what you promised me, dear? When you saw me shiver in the cold?”

More silence. Byleth tried to hide her disappointment. No matter how bad things got between them, there was always a part of Dimitri that would come back to her. She knew he would forgive her eventually, but as she walked out of the study, she knew tonight would not be the night.

“That I would always be here to keep you warm.” His voice caught her off guard. She turned around though his face still focused on his documents. She held her breath, almost too afraid to ask again.

“Yes. Dimitri…I’m cold tonight. Is- is now a bad time to ask for some of that warmth?”

He set his quill down. His brows furrowed in thought.

Finally he lifts his head up and sighs.

“Of course it isn’t. Come here.” At the invitation, Byleth felt her tighten muscles relax and was surprised at how tense her body felt. He shifted his legs to give her space and wrapped his huge arms around her, as affectionately as he would any other day.

“I was worried that I had made you mad,” she said quietly snuggling against his chest.

“I can’t stay mad at you, beloved. I gave you my word. And a knight of Faerghus never goes back on his word,” he cooed, gently nuzzling her hand on his cheek. “Especially on you, my love.”

“I hate our angry silences, Dimitri,” she murmured, kissing his chin. He nodded but his eyes, half-lidded and downcast, did not meet hers. She huffed.

“I hate when you try and bury yourself with work to avoid talking to me.” She gingerly reached behind his head and untied the knot for his eyepatch. “And most of all, I hate it when you try to avoid looking at me.” The eyepatch fell revealing his milky, almost blind eye. Gently, she ran her fingers across the scarred skin. He closed his eyes allowing her soothing touch to envelop the sensitive skin. Her fingers then traced over the lines underneath his eyes. As time passed, these types of lines grew more prominent on his face and she wished to memorize their subtle creases. Finally, he opened his eyes and focused on her.

“I’m sorry,” he said quietly, “For losing my temper. I shouldn’t have- I shouldn’t have raised my voice at you. Or punched the table.”

“Dimitri…”

“When I became angry it terrified me, beloved,” he admitted, loosening his embrace and pulling back. “It felt too much like the old days, when I lashed out at everyone who tried to help me. When I would threaten or lash out at you. I didn’t want to hurt you but I felt like if I looked at you, I was going to take my anger out on you again. I’ve hurt you so much already I-“

“Dimitri,” she interrupted. Using her hand, she gently guided him back to her. “You didn’t hurt me. I said such horrible, hateful things to you. I’m sorry. I can’t blame you for being mad when I was being unreasonable. I got too emotional.“

To her surprise, he started chuckling. “Too emotional? Now that’s a rare statement from you. To think, there was a time when I thought you didn’t have emotions.” Still laughing, he kissed her forehead. “But you feel them as much as anyone don’t you, my beloved?”

She nodded. Placing his hands on her face, he pulled her in for a kiss. His lips hungrily pressed against hers while his hands started explored her body insatiably. Unable to breathe but desperately not wanting it to end, she ran her fingers frantically over the back of his neck. He moaned with satisfaction and she felt his body tremble underneath her touch. At last, he broke the kiss. She panted for breath as he started stroking her cheek.

“Let’s just let bygones be bygones, yes? We’ll figure out a solution together. Like we always do.”

“Yes,” she smiled.“Like we always do.” Letting his warmth sink into her, she listened to his steady heartbeat. This heartbeat that soothed her countless times over the past decade. It had been a while since the two them had a quiet moment like this. With the chaos of daily life, she almost forgot how much she loved her husband.

She felt him shift underneath her and he gazed at her with renewed confidence. “Now tell me, beloved. Where do you feel chilled?”

“It’s difficult to describe the sensation,” she smiled, coyly. “You may have to check everywhere, dear.”

“Very well,” he chuckled, lifting her up. “But I will warn you. I am thorough in my investigation.”

The next morning, Archbishop was simply radiant. Her rare smile graced many of the delegates within the council that it was later rumored that the Goddess herself took hold of the Archbishop to grant her approval of the new legislation and battle formations. The King, on the other hand, entered the conference with the spark and energy of a man half his age. He boldly proclaimed to lend the King of Lions Corps to spearhead the front for Hrym and eliminate the growing bandit problem. Aside from some snide comments from Felix, the proceedings ended without a hitch. The two were so peaceful and amicable with each other, as if the argument the day before had never occurred.

Naturally, everyone noticed.

“I’m so glad they’re back to normal,” sighed Rodrigue, relieved to see his parents getting along. His younger brother Kain skeptically shook his head.

“I don’t know if you could call this normal.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope I didn't make anyone too harsh in this chapter.


	6. Chapter 6

**7 Guardian Moon, 1206**

Her blade clashed against his lance.

The blow did not deter him so she quickly drew back to gain distance from her blond opponent. He pulled his lance up to maintain a defensive stance, eyeing her. His technique had improved but at this rate, he'd break his lance and Byleth preferred to end this duel with both unscathed. She lunged and her rival swiftly blocked. His youth gave him an advantage in speed and against normal opponents, he would emerge victorious. However, her years of experience outweighed his energy, moving her past the rank of an ordinary opponent. With the finesse of her blade, she managed a winning blow.

Rodrigue stepped back, grimacing from the knock to his arm.

“I didn’t hurt you, did I?” He shakes his head, rotating his arm.

“I’m fine. It’s my pride that’s injured more than anything. I thought for sure I was going to win today but I can never seem to hit you, mother.”

“You need to give yourself credit. You’ve improved a lot over the past few months.” He nods, acknowledging her praise, and started wiping the sweat from his brow. Byleth eyed him intently. “Rodrigue, come here a moment.”

“What is it, mother?” She pulls out a handkerchief from her satchel and he stares, puzzled.

“You have a smudge on your cheek.” As she brought the handkerchief closer to him, his cheeks start to flush.

“M-Mother! Please I’m not a child! I can clean it myself.” She smiled, feeling somewhat bittersweet.

“But you’ll be leaving soon. Let me indulge as your mother, just this once.” Though he tries to pull away, ultimately, he complies to his mother’s wishes. At times like these, he really did remind her of his father, so courteous and bashful. She scrubbed the dirt away and took another opportunity to gaze at his soft features. “There. My handsome boy.”

Suddenly, she felt the icy blow of a stray snowball smash against her back. Another one quickly struck Rodrigue in the forehead. Hurried chatter drew them to the source.

“What the-?” Dodging behind the pillars, the twins engaged in a fierce snowball competition and once they were spotted, the two started running away.

“Kain! Avel!” chided Byleth. “What have I told you about throwing those here? That’s dangerous!”

“Sorry mother!”

“We’ll go somewhere else, I promise!”

“Grr… those two,” fumed Rodrigue, wiping the snow off. “They’re going to be in a lot of trouble when I get my hands on them.” He dashes off to hunt the troublemakers down, leaving his mother to store away the practice equipment. The quick steps of her daughter redirected her attention and Byleth managed to catch a glance at her outfit.

“Shiida, what I have told you about wearing those types of dresses here?”

“Oh mother, don’t fret,” she said, proudly puffing out her chest, her improper outfit further emphasizing the ample bosom she inherited. “It’s the typical fashion among the noble ladies up here in the North. Ira told me.”

“Yes dear, during the summer seasons. During the winter season, it’ll make you catch cold.”

“I’m bringing a shaw,” she said indignant.

“It had better be a cloak because I refuse to let you leave with anything less.” Shiida frowned, ready to start an argument when loud footsteps interrupted her.

“Shiida, listen to your mother.” Dimitri’s authoritative presence helped defuse the argument. In his arms, Edel snuggled against his warm cape while Geralt followed closed behind. Shiida huffs but ultimately gives in.

“Fine. I’ll go find something else.” As she walked away, Byleth sighs over her rebellious daughter. This was hardly the first time she tried leaving the castle in ridiculous fashion.

“She’ll be fine,” said Dimitri, reassuring her with a quick peck on the cheek. “How was training?”

“Good, until the twins decided to interrupt. Rodrigue is getting better though.” As she spoke, she spotted Geralt hiding behind his father and she bent down towards him. “How were the stables, darling?”

“The stables were fun! I got to see all kinds of horses.” She beamed. Unlike the other children, Geralt didn’t inherent his features from Byleth or Dimitri. Instead his sandy brown hair and prominent nose reminded her of his grandfather. She supposed it was coincidence but she felt blessed all the same. As she picked him up, she thought about her father- how he would have loved to see his grandchildren. To see Byleth happy and married. And perhaps to see Fódlan evolve into a better place.

“Really? I want to hear all about it,” she hummed, running her fingers through his hair. Dimitri leaned in to provide her another peck on the cheek and whispers, “They said the night will be cold, beloved.”

“Oh yes,” she smiled coyly. “Very cold. It’s important to keep warm.”

The evening rolled around and as Byleth finished her bath, she couldn’t help but reflect on the past twenty years of her life. Twenty incredible years. Though she supposed it was closer to twenty-five but the five year slumber threw off her sense of time. So much had changed. Empires and Alliances crumbled; borders opened to the east and west; ancient enemies of the continent vanquished. Naturally, she changed too. She felt more alive now.

If she hadn’t met the three students of the Officer’s Academy all those years ago, where would she be now? Certainly not the Archbishop. She’d probably still travel the continent as a mercenary with her father- not miserable but not content either.

Would she have built a connection with Sothis? Back when she first hear her voice, she tired of Sothis’ constant nagging and snide comments. Now, she treasured her guidance and friendship.

Would she have ever made any friends or gotten married? Unlikely. She had no connections to anyone outside her father.

Before she slipped into her nightgown, she looked in the mirror and sighed.

After twenty years and five pregnancies, her body changed, no matter how much Dimitri claimed otherwise. Though still physically fit, her wide hips and thighs grew beyond her svelte form as a mercenary. The crow’s feet around her eyes grew more prominent and her graying hair became impossible to conceal. Her bad knee ached more often with the cold and her reactions in battle slowed.

The young mercenary with cold eyes and stoic fierceness vanished. The immortal avatar to the goddess was a thing of rumor. She was merely a mortal woman, getting old.

And yet Dimitri looked at her as if she was Sothis herself, descending from heaven on her blue star towards their bed.

“Beloved,” he murmured softly, his big calloused hands stroking her cheeks. She brushed his golden hair out of his face and gazed into his beautiful, blue eye. A few weeks ago, during the anniversary of the Founding of Garreg Mach, Dimitri grew so distressed. He had dealt with his bouts of grief for years and he always struggled to return to normal. It warmed her heart to see him doing so much better. She leaned in for a kiss and he returned her love tenfold.

The love between them was slower now, more gentle, but it heated her stony heart in ways she never imagined.

“Dear, these winter nights in Faerghus nights are so very cold,” she whispered softly.

“Don’t worry, I’ll always be here to keep you warm.”

She nodded. It was a promise well kept.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... to answer Shiida's question from the beginning, the reason all the kids have birthdays in the fall is because the parents did too good a job 'keeping warm in the winter'. 
> 
> Thank you to everyone who commented and left kudos for this fic. This was fun to write and I hope I can come back with more in the future.

**Author's Note:**

> This is a sort of a sequel to Reflections of an Azure Moon but it's not required for you to enjoy this story.


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